I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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