I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
i need to put some appletini on your dick
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
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