so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
