Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry armymedic84 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(407): View more from Florida

Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...

Fav 26 3679 1234
share tweet
(419): View more from Ohio

All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.

Fav 5 1104 4784
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(315): View more from New York

thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.

Fav 25 3686 2434
share tweet
(951): View more from California

Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries

Fav 15 2503 4298
share tweet
(708): View more from Illinois

My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.

Fav 4 1611 3627
share tweet
(978): View more from Massachusetts

You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"

Fav 3 2167 1151
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(989): View more from Michigan

If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back

(906): View more from Michigan

I resent that

Fav 6 3488 2190
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(410): View more from Maryland

It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.

Fav 1 718 867
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(910): View more from North Carolina

Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.

Fav 0 34 11
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT