Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Randomize
