I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
The adults are the big ones right?
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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