i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
