One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
