The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
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