Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
