yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
