Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
ugly people sure do ruin things
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
