...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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