its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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