No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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