yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
