Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(906): View more from Michigan

So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.

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(956): View more from Texas

She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode

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(985): View more from Louisiana

Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!

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(315): View more from New York

I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?

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(519): View more from Ontario

He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?

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(905): View more from Ontario

I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?

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(734): View more from Michigan

Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?

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(210): View more from Texas

Anything special planned for Valentines Day?

(310): View more from California

Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?

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