Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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