help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Randomize
