I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I just want to make out with him forever
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize
