Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
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