is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Randomize
