He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize