Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Please don't give away my fajitas
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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