We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
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