drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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