hell yes lets make some ravioli
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
