So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize