Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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