A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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