Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Randomize
