There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
