so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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