Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
