i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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