We named our party play list daddy issues
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Houston, we have a squirter
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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