Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
