well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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