jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Randomize
