Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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