I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Everclear isn't food dammit
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Randomize
