Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize