i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
