forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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