why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
