Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize
