her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I believe in your delicious
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
