This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
we should paint friendship bongs
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
