I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Randomize