I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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