I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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