chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
She announced her abortion via fbk
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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